Oh my. She is practically a teenager.

Not only is every other word in her vocabulary, "Like," but now this!

 You should have seen how sweet she looked sleeping there last night. She slept in it all night and didn't fall out.  I think she did wake up once and cried a little bit.  I think she forgot where she was.

John worked so hard yesterday.  He took down the loft, helped our friends carry it over to their apartment (which oddly enough is the same apartment we got it from, and they put it in the same spot!), put it together over there, only to come right back to carry Maryn's new furniture upstairs.  He put together the bed, we rearranged lots of things in both kids rooms, and I tried to vacuum and dust every time we moved anything.  It was exhausting, let me tell you.  Then we used a valance our friends gave us with the bed to cover up the unsightly toys in Maryn's closet...

 So Maryn's closet is now home to her kitchen, dress up clothes, some school storage, and above on the racks there are hundreds of toys for rotation or to only get down when the kiddos ask for them.  It's a mess in this picture...sorry!

Maryn has been so tired and yucky feeling lately.  We may just need to get outside more, but today during Josiah's nap, we tried this fun little activity with her old crayons.

 We unwrapped and broke several dull crayons and sorted them by color into this silicone mold.  Then we let them melt in the oven set at 200 degrees for about 15 minutes.  In a couple hours, we will pop them out and we'll have new gingerbread man crayons!  I may make some into Christmas ornaments.

This activity kept my tired little girl's fingers busy and her bottom still for about half an hour this afternoon.  And for that I am grateful!

 She's such a big girl.  :)

Play with Grandma, Aunt Cathy and Auntie Sara!

Much of our visits with Grandma include coloring.  Josiah is just getting the hang of it.  

 And Play Doh!

 And crafts!

 And baking!

 And after the kids went to bed, FROSTING and SPRINKLES!  And Harry Potter.  :)

Christmas Joy!

Here is a cute wintery craft we did today.  My aunt Cathy sent this for us to do last year, but for some reason we never got around to it.  But look what a good job Maryn did with it this year.  I am glad we waited.  She colored it herself of course, and she also cut out the wings and the feet all by herself!

But my favorite part, the most wonderful thing of all, is the little "plaid" she made on the penguin's hat.  How stinkin' creative is that?  I could swear sometimes she has the mind of a professional designer of some sort.  I don't think any of us have being drawing plaid or making plaid around the house, but obviously she's noticed it somewhere.  

 I did have to help her glue all the pieces on.  Cathy sent us a sample picture, but isn't it hard for kiddos to copy a sample just right?

At our Kids' Crafternoon yesterday, I was really surprised how many kids (even 8-10 year olds) honestly have no idea how to use school glue, glitter, or make a simple craft like the one above by following a sample.  This is a great tragedy of what No Child Left Behind does to our school systems.  Teachers think they don't have time for those things any more.  But the truth is, these things are absolutely vital to a child's understanding, development and knowledge of how things are made, how things are pieced together, how to follow directions, be creative, pay attention to detail, etc.

When I was teaching, I always found a way to incorporate crafts like the one above into our daily schedule.  That's right--DAILY (okay, maybe not the glitter part).  They usually did things like this during their reading workstations while I was with a small group.  If the principal asked, "how does this involve reading, or improve reading skills?"  I could obviously point out several ways it improves reading skills.  Teachers and Parents:  You gotta be creative, too!

Here's a creative spin on a play date.  Maryn and Ella (mostly Ella) were having a hard time eating their pasta (especially the spinach part), and I remembered we had a giant apple fritter in the kitchen, which I wanted to eat really badly.  So I told them we were going to have a birthday party for Jesus with a doughnut and candles and Christmas plates and Christmas napkins!  But they had to eat their pasta first.  And what do you know, they did.  And we had a little birthday party for Jesus.

 Here's a picture of Josiah after our Kids' Crafternoon.  He sustained several injuries after my neglect of him while setting up and helping other kids do their crafts (by that I mean, clean up glitter and tear it from overexcited children's hands).

 He got a giant bump on his head, a bloody lip, and some kind of carpet burn all over his cheek/chin.  And this morning, Maryn wailed a block at his head so that he now has a gash on the other side of his forehead.

Today, I finally got motivated to make cookie dough for our Christmas cut outs, a family tradition for as long as I can remember.  Maryn was a very good helper.  We read the ingredients list together, gathered them all up, lined them all up in order, read their labels, practiced adding and subtracting ("There are only 5 eggs in this carton.  How many more do we need?  Yes, we need ONE more egg.").  It was so sweet, because later Maryn used this same language with John, saying, "There are three snowflakes and we need one more!"

Now that our craft nights and our monthly food line is behind us, I feel a huge weight off my shoulders.  John has the next two days off and then my mom and Sara will be here for the weekend.  I think God is starting to bless me with some Christmas joy, and I pray it continues.  I pray I can find peace in this holiday, and give to others without feeling obligated or burdened.  That I could make cookies with my sweet daughter, the way my grandmother and my mother and my aunts always did with me, without making it out to be a huge chore, a duty of sorts, or a hassle.  And I pray there are many Italian subs in my future as well.  ;-)

Josiah, 16 months

My baby boy is 16 months old, which is dreadfully close to one and a half, which is too close to age two!

Josiah grows in giant spurts, mentally and physically.  He started walking a couple weeks ago and boom, he is suddenly doing a hundred things that amaze me.  His sign language and words have exploded.  Today, we finished with dinner and made a run for the bathroom.  We typically wash up after dinner in the sink, so I thought, is he going to wash his hands?  Sure enough, I found him picking up the stool, moving it to the front of the sink, and getting on it to wash his hands.  How cute is that?  He rubbed his hands together to make bubbles with the soap, too.  I love it.

Now just pray he'd sleep like a normal toddler, okay?  Normal being....12 straight hours without waking up, lol.

Busy busy!

Josiah, a little worn out:

 Maryn received quite a treat the other day.  She got to help me at the STOVE for the very first time.  She was so excited to stir the butter and the marshmallows for our Rice Krispies Treats until they melted.  It was a little science experiment.  Isn't home schooling great?  :)

I thought she might want to be at the stove all the time now that I let her once, but she is such a smart, sweet girl. She understands it's only for sometimes.  John and I are really starting to appreciate this about her.  We chalk it up to our good, old fashioned, inconsistent parenting skills.

Everyone will tell you, "consistency is key!"  But in life things just are not consistent.  Sometimes Mommy thinks it's funny when you dump baking soda on your head.  Other times, Mommy might sit down and cry if you dump baking soda on your head.  It's all okay.  The kids will be all right.  :)

Christmas Crafts

I suggested John and Maryn make this felt gingerbread man together.

He wasn't very pleased.

He's not very patient with our little crafter, and he doesn't let her make any mistakes!

But look how much she loves him.

I think she enjoyed it.

 We made a cute gift bag.

 Josiah has been rather artsy lately as well.  Sticking his tongue out while he concentrates, just like another boy I know.  :)

 Some photos of Ladies' Craft Night...here's Joanna :)

 Debbie, Marissa, and Charissa....

 Here was my big project on Tuesday night, since Hobby Lobby didn't have what I needed for ribbon trees.  I found a bow making tutorial on Pinterest, and got to work.  I did this last year but this year it looks a thousand times better.  If you want to try something like this though, I would suggest wider ribbon.  I think mine is about two inches thick.  Then after you make the bow, you can do separate ribbons down the sides, and you hook your Christmas cards on there with clothespins, which I decorated with little satin ribbons.  I always use Tacky Glue for these projects.  I despise hot glue, and I only use it if absolutely necessary.  Tacky Glue seems to always do the trick.

If this is too long and boring, don't read it :)

I am getting ready to update Maryn and Josiah's scrapbooks.  Maryn's was started by Alicia and chronicles her first three months of life in great creative splendor.  Josiah's was started by me, and chronicles his first year of life in about 7 little pages that I completed in less than an hour.  I intend to get them both up to date by Christmas with the same tenacity and quality as I did with Josiah's.

I had to load up my Snapfish cart with pictures from my facebook, which stores all my photos, and I had to go back to all my favorites of Maryn's childhood so far.  Such sweet times with our baby girl, and how she's grown!

As most of you know, we all got sick Wednesday.  John came home from work late Tuesday night with a stomach bug.  He slept on the floor of the bathroom all night and after I went to get Josiah and Maryn out of their beds, I was in the other bathroom for a while...both kids standing beside me of course as I knelt over the toilet.  Glorious.

The hours that passed that day were incredibly unpleasant, but our sweet neighbor Elise took both of our children all morning (9:30-1:00).  Sometime around 3:00 Maryn cried that her belly hurt, ran back to her room, and threw up everywhere--mostly on her dress up clothes.  Sadly, very sadly, some of her dress up clothes got ruined in the dryer.  Her Snow White dress and her very favorite dress up costume, the fairy from Halloween last year.  She hasn't noticed that they are gone yet, but it broke my heart.  She wore that fairy costume almost every day her whole second year of life.  I am seriously considering looking for a replacement online even if we just keep it as a keepsake.

Fortunately by that time John was feeling A LITTLE better, but I was still throwing up.  Also, whenever I get any kind of sick, a migraine always accompanies the illness.  So my main woe was actually the headache.  I was insanely hungry and kept trying to eat small bits of things.  It's tricky being sick while pregnant because it's so easy to become dehydrated, and if an expectant woman doesn't eat for hours, she will feel nauseated.  So it was a losing battle.  I felt miserable clear up until Friday (mostly from the migraine), when I finally surrendered and drank coffee.  I felt terrific after that.  Poor Maryn was the sickest I've ever seen her, throwing up all night, almost once every hour.  Since I was still miserable myself, John had to sleep with her all night and take care of her even though he was still not feeling well himself.  I still think I am in recovery mode, but my son is not cooperating with my sleep cycle...and we are just busy.

Most people have a lot to do in the month of December.  When you're a one car family, you have to fit all those errands into very small windows of time but still try to "enjoy the season," and time together and all that.

Today I squeezed in a trip to Hobby Lobby, which I did NOT have time for, but I wanted ribbon to try to make the craft from Ladies Craft Night.  It was such a nightmare, and we ended up walking out of the store with nothing at all, Maryn almost having a meltdown on the way out.

So, Ladies' Craft Night.  I had been thinking of doing this for a long time.  A lot of people think I'm crafty.  I do like and enjoy creating art (painting, drawing) but I rarely feel it's worth the time and money.  I like doing kids' crafts, too (with kids, not by myself).  But I just don't make a lot of stuff we actually use around the house, and the question is--why?  Well, it costs a lot of money to be crafty for one thing.  And, it's lonely.  But if I had a friend sitting next to me doing a similar project, wouldn't the time go faster?  And wouldn't it be less stressful?

So we planned a Ladies' Craft Night.  I chose two crafts, which was tricky itself because it couldn't be something that needed a lot of drying time, coats of paint, etc.  It couldn't require a lot of nicer materials (like scrapbooking dye cutters, sewing machines, etc.) or special skills (sewing, crocheting).  We did ribbon trees and a Christmas countdown calendar.  When buying the supplies, I had no idea how many people would come, but I sort of suspected it would be a total flop.  So many people were sick and it had been raining for days.  But I guessed maybe 15 women would come at most, and loaded (LOADED) up my cart at JoAnn's.  Maryn and I were there for 2 hours.  We nearly cleaned out their ribbon and tree forms, and the cashier and other customers probably thought I was nuts.

Maryn, by the way, did a fantastic job at JoAnn's.  I am so proud of her.  Her only complaint at the end, at 1:00 (we missed lunch and 1:00 is normally quiet time), was that she was hungry and, "I miss my daddy!"  See, we have to run errands like this when John is home because we need the car of course, so we did miss Daddy indeed.  And while we usually can go grocery shopping as a family, JoAnn's is a less pleasant experience with the boys along.  :)

So my total bill at JoAnn's, even with some measly coupons, was $250.  I bought some things for the Kids' Crafternoon (next Monday) as well, but still.  I almost passed out, put it on our new American Express Rewards card (to be reimbursed by our property managers), said a prayer and headed home.

So I am not kidding you, I think nearly 30 people came to this craft night.  I mean, I know it was a good idea (for me!) but apparently everyone else thought so too!  I was so happy to see a great turnout but we did NOT have enough materials.  Meg and Beth had to run to JoAnn's for more, but apparently they hadn't restocked since my visit.  I didn't even get to make a ribbon tree.  I think I am going to give up on it, because I am starting to wonder if it's a curse on me.  It just wasn't meant to be.

I was also happy that it was a good mixture of people.  Not just seminary wives.  The cute young seminary wives without children yet, and the old seminary wives with at least two, four sweet Muslim ladies, and several women not associated with the seminary at all of all ages.  Two of our blind lady friends came with their seeing eye dogs, and though I was a little worried about how they'd do with the ribbon and straight pins craft, they really did an excellent job.  I think everyone had a great time.

I also found a second person to drive for our monthly Food Line distribution!

Sometimes, it's just one success after another!

And I tried all the crafts tonight for our Kids' Crafternoon and had to re-plan the whole thing because every craft was a total failure.

Sometimes, it's just one let down after another.  :-(

But all in all I would say we are having a great December so far.  Our sickness was dreadful, I'm still days behind on laundry, but we did have a lot of quality time laying around and cleaning up after each other when we could.  :)

I think I'll post pictures for this post tomorrow, or I'll do a whole post with pics.  Or just look on my facebook page.  I'm tired, and Josiah is finally asleep!  Yay!

The only thing better than finding my ex-boyfriend on facebook and discovering he is fat, is finding my husband's ex-girlfriend on facebook and discovering SHE is fat.

Just kidding, just kidding.

The Mediocre and Mundane

Motherhood includes many mountaintop experiences.  My breath has been lost at the sight of a precious new baby in my arms.  My heart is made happy by my children smiling up at me, and realizing that John and I are their favorite people in the whole wide world.  They say the funniest things.  They do some seriously odd things that make us laugh and laugh.  For example, every time we play Ring Around the Rosie, Josiah crawls right out of the room afterward giggling, only to quickly return to play again.

But most of motherhood is mundane tasks.  And many times, I am very mediocre in my mothering.  Here you see Maryn smiling really big to show you her newly brushed "princess" teeth.  But after I loaded this picture on my blog, I realized that her mouth is caked in Chef Boyardee Beefaroni.  Did I notice that then?  No.  She's been asleep for a solid 3 hours now.  Oh well.  

  

 Here's Josiah in his Christmas jammies, trying to share his toothbrush with his sister who is, naturally, appalled at his gesture.  If you've never experienced Josiah's radiance of sweetness, you should come spend some time with him :)

I have been getting seriously ticked at Maryn for loading up her "Mayflower" or "Boat" or "Ark" or whatever with all her belongings.  This means she dumps every toy in her room onto her bed.  She did it again today and I stayed calm, just made her clean it up.  But she was tired and whiny, and I was nearly exploding, so I started threatening her that we were going to put all of her toys away, that we'd throw toys away, that we would donate them to needy children, and more terrible, awful threats that carried no meaning whatsoever.  Maryn opted to throw the toys away rather than clean them, of course, so you can imagine how the story ends.  I ended up helping her clean it all up.  Now I realize that little punk pulled a fast one on me.  Some day I will be better at this.

We didn't really have dinner.  Maryn and I ate veggie burgers and marshmallows at 4:00, so we weren't very hungry at 5:30.  Josiah was of course, so we had good ol' Chef Boyardee.  I think it was Maryn and Josiah's first taste of Chef Boyardee.  I knew Josiah would love it because he loves all kiddie foods.  I served it with french green beans from Trader Joe's, which they also loved.

Then we were getting ready for bed.  I told Maryn she could read while I did Josiah's bed time routine.  I chose a stack of books for her, and as she was jumping around like a spider monkey, I tossed the books onto her bed.  Only trouble was, she jumped onto the bed at the same time.  The books smacked her right in the neck.  I tried not laugh or cry.  It was so horribly awful, that poor little girl!

So later as we were praying before bed, I prayed something like:

"I pray you would help me be a better mommy..."

And Maryn cut in, "And pray God forgives your sin for hitting me with all those books."

Oh my goodness.  I'm going to get reported to CPS.

Special, special times

This is how I get my hair and makeup done in the morning since DST ended:

 The handprint reindeer ornament we made on Wednesday.  So cute!

 Maryn loves our tree.  And lights.  And ornaments.  And Christmas!

 Here she is hanging up the special ornament she chose this year on our annual Hallmark trip.

 I accidentally turned almost ALL my pictures for this post the wrong way :)  Sorry!  But here is her ornament this year.  It's a Madame Alexander doll.  I have no idea why she picked it.  I thought she'd pick Cinderella or a ballerina, but chose this cute little Christmas doll.  She is cute!

 Here's the ornament Josiah chose (we sort of chose for him, but he seemed to like playing with this box the best).  It's a Woody and Buzz ornament.

 Here they are reading the Christmas books we got out.  They found the ones Grandpa Erdman and Uncle Mark and Aunt Melissa recorded for them.  Maryn went CRAZY when she heard Grandpa's voice, and she's been listening to them almost every day since.

 John brought home an early Christmas present for me.  They put it together last night!  It's a new end table, and it's so pretty!

 Here's Maryn hanging the star!

 Remember Josiah's favorite little friend in the backyard, Chloe?  She and her family are moving away in the next few days.  That's all I'm going to write about it because I will start bawling.

We have been having a good time despite all the rain the last two days.  We had friends over today.  12 kids, 5 mothers.  3 of the mothers are pregnant!  We invited a new neighbor, Charissa, and her two little boys.  I think we made her happy today.  She's due with their third in just a couple weeks and was very worried about making friends in a new place with a baby coming so soon.  She couldn't believe we had 12 kids in our tiny apartment, that they were all well-behaved, and that we pulled together a lunch for all of us with a little teamwork.

I love where we live!

Even if the ceiling IS leaking again!

I'm pregnant. I DESERVE to write a long-winded post about myself and my feelings that no one cares about.

Hi everyone!  I am feeling a lot better than I was the other day when I whined and complained and felt ungrateful and sad and entitled and selfish.  I still feel that way a little bit.  I think we all do to a certain degree.  I usually go through a little depressed state when I am pregnant.  I think it's just the hormones talking.  This pregnancy, I'm going to just come right out with it.

John and I had a date night grocery shopping last night at 8:30 pm.  Both kids woke up for our sweet neighbor while we were gone.  :)  Which almost never happens.  I watched her kids today in exchange so she could go grocery shopping.  Her baby slept the whole time (babies sleep?  Mine don't!)  and Maryn, Ella and Ella Grace played extremely well together.  Elise (downstairs neighbor) came over and we folded laundry together.  It was really nice.

I got our kitchen cleaned, mostly.  It's kind of difficult to get it cleaned because I'm always having to feed my kids or myself and John.  What a pain eating is!  I'm sort of on a 5 meals per day plan so there's always dishes to do.  Elise may have talked me into asking for (praying/pleading for) a portable dishwasher.  It seems stupid, but I just can't keep up with the dishes.  One reason is because I can see NOTHING from the kitchen, so if Josiah is awake, I really can't do dishes.  I can try, but I usually get interrupted...so I just wait.  And wait, and wait.  And then it becomes 8 pm and pregnant women, at least this one, can't do much at all after 8 pm.

I think I'm feeling very discontent.  I wish I had a dishwasher and I wish we could eat out more often.  I wish I could order pizza for once.  But I say that and you know, I am glad we don't waste our money eating out.  It is a waste of money, and there are other things we need or want that are more important or valuable.  I am just very whiny.  I realize this.

We got together with the Dooleys the other night!  The Dooleys were friends of ours in Naples (they live in TN now) and their daughter London was born two days before Maryn.  We were actually in the hospital together.  Stacie got me through being a new mom because we could sit and laugh and complain together without feeling judged too much.  It was neat for our girls and our two boys to play together.  Even though they didn't play all that well and we gave up and put on a movie!  It was a little late, lol.

Anyway, Stacie complimented me that I am a very content person.  She pointed out that we had a card table as a dining room table for a year and a half, and no washer and dryer for a few months, and no microwave for a year, etc.  But I am the most discontent person.  Now we have a table, a washer and dryer, a microwave...and we got all of them cheap or free.  Good things do come to those who wait, I guess.  But now I just want more.  And more.  And more.

I want little boy Nikes for Josiah!  I want beautifulllll maternity dresses so I can feel pretty even when I am fat.  I want to eat whatever food I'm craving at the very moment I crave it :)  I think this might be part of pregnancy.  Society kind of teaches us, "I'm pregnant, I deserve this."  I can't help sometimes but to think that's true.

Anyway, when we were with Nathan and Stacie, Josiah did so well.  He is such a little love bug.  He sat on Nathan's lap and Nathan rubbed the back of his head.  When he stopped, Josiah signed that he wanted more!  How stinkin' cute is that?  He hardly ever does that sign, not even for food.  But he did it for a guy he's just met to get him to rub his head.  What a little sweetheart.

Maryn, on the other hand, didn't really want to talk to anybody.  She just wanted to play with all of London's toys and not share a thing.  Ah, kids.

Excuse me while I act like a two year old for a minute.

I'm tired of everyone being thankful.  I'm tired of the little snail that I painted on the changing table 3 years ago always smiling at me.  More friends are moving away.  But the world just goes on being happy.  I am happy and grateful, but I am just not grateful for my friends moving away.  Not.  Happy.  Boo.

Christmas

I just spent way too much time on the computer making Christmas presents and Christmas shopping.  My whole body hurts!  It might be better to just go out and shop, seriously.

Guess what?

I am so excited for Christmas.

Avon Adoption Fundraiser

Our sweet friends Kara and David from Naples have a unique opportunity to adopt their adopted son's biological brother, due in June. I just got a bunch of new makeup and stocking stuffers (stuff we were going to buy somewhere anyway) from their Avon fundraiser online. Take a look at their deals and as long as you buy before his birth, it will go toward their adoption. Go to www.youravon.com/kjansen and click on Online Events to get to the fundraiser. When you click "Shop My Online Event" the proceeds from any purchase you make online will be applied to their adoption!


I got the little roll on bath soaps for kids to write on themselves as stocking stuffers, plus my favorite eyeliner (glimmersticks), new mascara, foundation, and nail polish.  A significant amount of what I spent, which is what I would have spent on my make up for the year anyway, will go towards their adoption.  Yes I know it's funny--I buy make up once a year.  


Avon is a great place to get gifts for moms and teenage or tween girls (who can be kind of hard to buy for), and of course their kids' stuff is adorable!  


Happy shopping!

Three Happy Children

Maryn was a big girl at Kroger and pushed all our groceries in a cart just her size.  I think I will start making her a list to read and check off.  She might do even better than daddy...at least I know she'd never forget the salami.

 Before Kroger, we went to McDonald's, one of the kids' favorite places of course.  Josiah was more excited about the food and Maryn was more excited about the Playplace.  John and I were excited that they had Coke glasses free with a large extra value meal.  So even though it was 3:00 in the afternoon and we'd had a large late lunch, we shared the cheapest value meal on the menu and went to Kroger stuffed full of terrible food that helped make us not want to buy up all of Kroger.  The kids had free ice cream cone coupons.  AND we got a free glass out of the whole deal!  We are S-M-A-R-T.

 A few third children I know are kind of rascally.  Or just kind of troublemakers in one way or another.  This is our little troublemaker, already near giving us a heart attack at the precious pre-natal age of 12 weeks:

He or she is still happy and healthy as they can be, waving and kicking around in there like the silly baby he/she is bound to be.  I hope this baby learns some self-control!

Ha, just kidding.  Nothing the baby or I did caused our little scare.

The next details may be too graphic for some readers, but this is my blog so I can write what I want, right?  And I personally always wondered what goes through a momma's mind when things like this happen.  On Wednesday at about 11:30 I sneezed and thought I peed my pants (it happens).  But when I went to the bathroom, with Maryn by my side and Josiah at my heels, I discovered it was not pee but blood.  And after I peed I realized the whole toilet was full of blood.  It was quite a lot.  Not enough to be a full miscarriage, but I started cramping soon after and wondered if I might end up miscarrying.  I tried to stay super calm, but Maryn saw the blood and was very worried about me.  She has never seen anything like that.  After she saw it, she wouldn't leave my side.  And she wouldn't let me leave her.  So she had to poop of course right after I had gone potty, so I had to wait for her, wipe her, and Josiah had just woken up from his nap.  He was crying, hungry, etc.  Both kids were hungry.  I had to try to call John and the doctor to find out what to do, all while staying calm and not letting tears collect in my eyes.  Maryn has a tendency to stare at my eyes to see if I might cry.  And I had to give them a snack to keep them from starving to death as I tried to call people.

We went downstairs to our neighbors' apartment.  I knew they'd understand and be comforting because they've experienced several situations like this one.  I knew Elise could calm my nerves as I waited for the nurse to call me back and for John to get home.  The nurse finally called about 15 minutes later and told me to just take it easy and rest.  To call back if there was more bleeding.

There was some more, so I called and got an appointment for an ultrasound and a doctor's appointment the next day.  John got home and I got to be on "bed rest" for 24 hours.  It was lovely.  No really it was.

So what goes through a mother's head when she thinks she might be miscarrying?  Honestly it wasn't the sort of thoughts I expected.  I was mainly concerned about having surgery (a D&C) or being on bed rest.  At the point I was at, I wasn't thinking about the loss of a life.  Maybe it was too unbearable for me to feel at that time or maybe my baby isn't that real to me yet, I don't know.  I truly wasn't worried about things.  God has always taken great care of us and I know all things work together for good for those who love Him, and I do love Him.  But I was very scared of surgery and bed rest.  I know worried and scared seem like the same emotions, but I know now they are different.

Anyway, Josiah is being a pain in the butt today :)  So I am going to go and wrangle him up.  You know how this story ends...so far, the baby is fine and everything looks okay.  Praise the Lord.  But if things had been worse, I hope I'd be able to say "Praise the Lord," still.  He is good.

Slow Cooker Freezer Meals

Slow Cooker Freezer Meals

I really loved this idea.  I'm not a big slow cooker fan, and neither is John, but these recipes seem very good, easy, and cheap.  The idea is to make as many meals as possible in a day (nap time!) and then put them in a Ziploc, freeze, and pop them into a Crock Pot during the M-A-D dinner rush.  The witching hour.  I truly know the meaning of that phrase now that my hubby often gets home at about 5:00.

This is a great idea for new Mommies, for people expecting to be laid up for a while, etc.  We didn't enjoy the freezer meals we made before.  Nothing seemed to reheat correctly and the preparation was intense.  This seems like it would be much easier.  I'll let you know if we try it!

This is my picky eater.

Josiah is a picky eater.  His favorite foods are peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, macaroni and cheese, and french fries (none of which Maryn likes at all).  But here he is eating orange sherbet mixed with peas that were mixed with a Chicken Tuscan Pasta.  He at almost all of it.  I may start mixing all his food with his dessert.  Yum....

In summary, I would just like to say:  Kids are WEIRD!

A Kid's Point of View: Kindergarten Screening

I have a very good long term memory.  I can remember things very vividly from my childhood, clear back to when I was probably 2 or 3 years old.  I think this is one of the reasons I understand kids more than some people do (sometimes, not all the time). 

When I went in for my kindergarten screening at age five, I walked into a gym with tables all around the perimeter.  The parents and their children had to wait up on the "stage" I believe.  Now this you'd think, especially if you were a teacher, may be a little intimidating to small children who have never been to school.  I had gone to preschool but I don't think I'd ever been in a gym and certainly never a school as massive as the one I went to.  My family never went to basketball games or anything like that.  I had never seen such a strange place in my life.  Each table had an adult, each of them a stranger, sitting behind it or beside it with a test for each child to pass.  At one station, a lady sat with pictures in a flip book for me to identify.  I can tell you to this day that one of those pictures, she told me, was a knife.  It did  not look like any knife I had ever seen.  I could draw it for you and you'd agree, it did not look like a knife.  She and my mom looked at each other as I stared at that card blankly, racking my brain about what it was.  My mom sighed, "She knows what that is...."  I thought, "Um, no I don't."  I could see that the fact I could not tell them what it was worried them.  The lady told me, "It's a knife."  I still stared at it.  It had no sharp edges or a handle, nothing to make it look like a knife. 

I remember Mr. Handwerk, my soon-to-be gym teacher and track coach (who is now incidentally the Mayor of my small hometown), sitting beside a table in a blue track suit.  Another strange thing I probably had never seen.  He wanted me to dribble a foursquare ball.  Do what?  He demonstrated.  I stared blankly.  Why should I even attempt such a thing?  I think I remember the ball rolling across the gym as soon as it left my hands. It's not that I couldn't, it was just something I had never done or thought to do (thanks Dad).

A few things that I did in that kindergarten screening landed me in a perception class.  I couldn't cut with scissors, I couldn't dribble a ball, and I didn't know what a knife was.  I was also incredibly shy, and the kindergarten screening itself scared the bejeebees out of me.  So my friend Stacey and I (also a lot like me, shy and intimidated by the screening) ended up in this perception class with some pretty um, developmentally delayed children.  At one point, the sweet tutor who worked with us every week just started letting Stacey and I play computer games while she worked with the kids who really needed it.

And the computer games weren't actually computers.  They were some kind of machines with cards in them...lol...a la Flintstones...I am old. 

I tell this story because I believe a lot of times, the misbehavior, shyness or awkwardness we see in kids occur for pretty good reasons.  If you see a kid acting in a way that you know is unusual for them or they suddenly seem sad, scared, angry, frustrated, etc., there could be a logical reason.  Think of how the little kids feel and consider their perspective. 

Clingy People...and my own self-righteousness

I have a story to tell you.

Once upon a time I used to have a pretty big heart.  I took it as my responsibility to reach out and be kind to the kids who often got left out.  In first grade, my mom volunteered to be a helper and go along on our field trip to the zoo.  The other kids whose moms were going and I lined up in front of the class and chose the kids we wanted in our group (what teacher does that?  Bad idea.).  I chose every kid who never gets chosen.  Including Crissy Anderson, a little girl who was always in trouble.  And Lisa, the little foster girl who rarely talked.  I forget the others.  That field trip was one of the worst field trips for me and for my mom.  There was a reason those girls didn't have any friends, I learned.  Some were exceptionally annoying and some, like Crissy, were just downright mean.

Then there was Jessica, who I every once in a while would sit with on the playground.  She always sat by herself.  So I'd sit with her sometimes.  This sort of built up a reputation for me, and my teachers always put me next to kids with special needs or kids with behavior issues.  My friends and I helped Kenneth understand his math homework.  We helped Leticia have confidence in standing in front of the class for a speech.  For outdoor education (a week long overnight camp with our school) in sixth grade, me and a few of my other do-gooder friends got paired in the largest room with all the special needs girls.  We helped Jessica find a waterproof sheet for her bed (a frequent bedwetter), gave her a makeover, taught her how to use deodorant, how to blow dry her hair, etc.

Now all these things are very nice.  And I know it's unusual for a kid that age to reach out to the outcasts.  But...it just always backfired.  Girl Scout camp was twice as bad as it would have been, thanks to being paired up with Jessica all week.  Kenneth had a serious crush on me and my friends because we helped him so much.

I think my experiences then make me a snob today.  I'm kind of scared of people like that now.  I shrink away from them.  Which is sad since I am now a Christian and back then, I was not.  I don't know where I am going with the story, but I ask that my praying friends reading would pray for me.  I am having a really hard time loving others genuinely, especially those who need a friend the most.

I don't know where I learned how to be so self-righteous (sin nature), but I know God loves me and gives me grace every day that I don't deserve.  That I am far worse than a frequent bed wetter, an annoying neighbor, or an angry co-worker.  I'm grateful God's love is perfect.  With Thanksgiving coming up, I hope he helps me reach out to people who might need some genuine love over these holidays.

Please pray for me.

Josiah is 15 months old

 Josiah and Maryn love to ride their cars around the house.  I'm sure our neighbors appreciate it.  :)  It's pretty much the only thing that keeps Josiah busy around here without him getting into too much trouble.  Well, we took the truck outside today and he had a little accident.

In our neighborhood, there are perfectly straight sidewalks with little surprise steps here and there.  Whoever designed it never had kids, that's for sure.  He was riding along and boom, right off the step.  Right over the handle bars, bashing his head on the sidewalk and crushing his hand under himself and the truck.  Somehow he also got a swollen eye, and a few scratches on his lip and nose, as well as a bloody elbow.  The hand was the worst looking, and he was holding it so limp, I thought maybe he had broken something in it.  But the swelling has gone down and it's no longer black and blue.  Anyway, the big news is...he got his first Band-Aid!  And he was so tough.  He only cried for a minute and got right back on the truck.  But he didn't go near the step again :)

Josiah is also a picky eater.  But he's a very typical kid, I think.  He LOVES peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, macaroni and cheese, cereal, and fruit.

All the ladies in the nursery still adore him.  He's been in his room probably longer than anyone since it's taking him so long to walk.  But they said they are okay with him not walking--they want him to stay (walkers move on to another room more walker-friendly).  "He's our favorite!"  They whisper to us sometimes.  And he always goes to people easily, and rarely has a hard time saying goodbye.  Unless I walk out our front door.  He gets upset then!

We love you Josiah, and it's so fun to watch you growing up!

Responding to Abuse

From Dr. Mohler (read full article here.)


Church leaders and pastors must decide now — not later — that we will respond to any report of sexual abuse with immediate action and an immediate call to law enforcement officials. We must decide in advance what we will do, and not allow ourselves to think that we can handle such a challenge on our own. Every church and Christian institution needs a full set of policies, procedures, and accountability structures. As leaders, we must develop the right instincts for right action.


We all need an immediate reality check. I discovered yesterday that the policy handbook of the institution I am proud to lead calls for any employee receiving a report of child abuse, including child sexual abuse, to contact his or her supervisor with that report. That changes today. The new policy statement will direct employees receiving such a report to contact law enforcement authorities without delay. Then, after acting in the interests of the child, they should contact their supervisor.

Oh, the things she says.

Maryn was helping me cook our biscuits and gravy (which were delicious, by the way.  Thanks Kendra!).  I noticed four huge fingerprints in the shortening and asked, "Maryn!  What happened to the shortening?"  She said, "Um...it got a little bit out of control."

I was hugging and kissing Maryn, and I said, "I love you!  And I love age three.  I LOVE that you are three!"  She said, "Well I'm going to have another birthday."  And of course I reminded her, "I'll still love you when you are four.  And when you're five and when you're six..."

John and Maryn were getting ready to go to Radio Shack for a new part for our TV.  Maryn was getting dressed to go with him.  In typical Maryn plan-ahead fashion, she asked, "Are there any cold aisles at Radio Shack?"  John assured her that no, there are no cold aisles at Radio Shack.  She asked again to make sure, "There are no cold aisles like at Kroger?"

I don't know how she thinks of the things she does.  The way she plans ahead amazes me.

Friday Fun

Josiah is feeling better.  His appetite is back.  He's been eating all day!  And he played with Play Doh for a long time this morning.  What a big boy!  He loved it and only took a few bites :)

Here's a Friday Funny for you!

Happy National Cupcake Day!

We went to a cupcake party today.  It was set for 11:00.  Apparently everyone in our neighborhood eats a lot later than we do.  I was unwilling to let my children fill up on cupcakes half an hour before lunch, so we had our lunch and arrived a little late to the party.  Maryn, in good Maryn fashion, dumped a pile of sprinkles on her cupcake, licked off the frosting and sprinkles, and sprinted for the playground.  Josiah, in good Josiah fashion, at his miniature cupcake in one bite and his sugar cookie in two seconds.

It was in the 50s today, and the playground was nice and cool.  We stayed until 12:30, when all the other kids' sugar highs were wearing off and they had to head home for lunch.  We came home, ate some Halloween candy and took naps.  Maryn fell asleep with the Target Toy Book on her face.  Fun times :)

We are getting excited for Thanksgiving and Christmas.  Are you?  I  know Christmas morning is going to be SO much fun this year.  We have big plans for some great gifts for our kiddos, and I am going to love to see their faces light up (followed by days of spoiled brat attitude, no doubt...lol...just kidding...).  I already got a few stocking stuffers, and some presents for a few family members and friends.  I feel so blessed to be able to give a few presents this year.  I am grateful!

Speaking of gratefulness, I put another Food Line under my belt on Tuesday, and scored a box of Jimmy Dean Sausage sandwiches, which is something I've been craving.  Maryn can't quite understand why I want Jimmy Dean Sausage sandwiches as my dessert rather than ice cream and cupcakes.  I don't even know if I have ever eaten the things before in my life, and they taste like cafeteria food, but man.  I like them.  John and I just had this discussion.  Remember cafeteria rib sandwiches?  They are one of those things that taste so good, but you know they are gross.  I was so happy to be a teacher and get to eat cafeteria food every day if I wanted to.  Chicken patties?  Yes, thank you.  Rectangle pizzas?  Seconds, please!  Chicken nuggets?  Yumm-o!

Well, it looks like Josiah is going to cry right through his nap time.  I better go rescue him.

Now I can be like Miss Betsy!

Now I can be like neighbor Betsy and make my own signs, since she never showed me how :-(

http://diddledumpling.blogspot.com/2010/05/tutorial-vintage-looking-painted-sign.html

Family Date (we skipped Cubbies! Yay!)

Just to answer a few questions...

Beth and Jodi:  Yes, I usually use dishwashing gloves but I haven't had any for a couple weeks.

Cathy and Jodi:  We have tried Zyrtec and Benedryl but they haven't worked for Josiah or Maryn, just made them tired.  Or in Maryn's case, Benedryl makes her crazy.  My MIL recommended trying Claritin D, a decongestant, so that will probably be our next step.

A new alphabet game we made...tossed a beanie baby onto a letter, and named the letter and its sound.  FUN!  Lasted about two minutes, though.  lol.

 Look at my adorable kids coloring today.  Josiah is feeling better.  Fever free now for 24 hours.  He looks awfully thin.

 We had a family date night which was um...not as fun as date night just John and me, but oh well.  Maryn was pretty excited to be out and about.  It gets dark so early, Maryn was flipping out that it was "night night time" and she was tired and needed to go to bed.  As we were driving home, Maryn said, "...but I want to go hang out at the library!"

This is the Mucho Grande Burrito at Sol Aztecas, one of our favorite Mexican places in Louisville.  New owners now though, and they wouldn't let me substitute rice and beans for french fries.  I have developed a disgust for rice.  I can hardly look at it.  Actually just typing the word makes me nauseous.  Sol Aztecas also doesn't bring a baby plate to the table like they used to (Cheerios, orange slices, crackers) and the almost completely non-English waiters are not there :-(  And the menus are too nice now, as well.  It feels less authentic.  Still decent though.  And we had a Groupon!

Are you all signed up for Living Social, Groupon and Seize the Deal?  Make sure you get on that.  You can get meals and other things at half price.  Great for date nights!  Are you on Swagbucks?  We've earned almost $200 in Amazon gift cards in the last 18 months, just by using their search engine.  That's incredible.

Well, I made it.  It's almost 10:00 and John is almost home from class.  I am still awake.  Thank God for Pinterest, speed cleaning, and home schooling.  They kept me busy and awake.

Josiah just has a really awful sore, red throat that is full of puss.  Gross.  It isn't strep, and it isn't bacterial, so the only thing we can do for him is fill him up with fluids and other soft foods.  Super soft, as in ice cream and applesauce.  He didn't have any signs of dehydration or pneumonia, thank the Lord.

Speed cleaning has been my method the last few days.  I've gone on speed cleaning kicks before, but it seems like my cleaning routine always has to change with the seasons of my children's lives.  Now that I have two very active children, I'm finding I can't ignore a room or two for even a day.  Each room needs some TLC daily.  And the bathroom, to my dismay, needs cleaning daily.  Maryn uses the potty and the sink a lot now, and I guess that means that everyone hangs out in the bathroom a lot more.  The sink is a daily catastrophe.  While I know the bath tub doesn't need scrubbed every day, I've been spraying it and wiping it every day or every other day.  Why?  Because I'm not scrubbing it any more.  And I wipe it down almost every day anyway because my hair is everywhere in it.  So spraying it while I'm at it makes sense.

So basically every room gets 10 minutes of TLC and I get whatever I can done in ten minutes.  And I do it a couple times a day or so...maybe not every room twice a day, but at least once a day.  The problem with this is I don't have the time or energy for big projects, but I never did before either.

Another sad thing is that our kitchen takes more than ten minutes to clean.  More like 923 minutes.  BAH HUMBUG, washing dishes!  I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate it!  And my poor fingernails hate it, too.

I'm such a downer lately!  I'm very negative when I'm in my first trimesters.  Hang in there.  Only two more weeks to go.

Coloring at the table!  Haha.

 Here's Maryn with the bear she won for the pumpkin decorating contest.  The bear has a spider on its head.  Too cute.  He's been her lovey the last week.

My poor baby is still stick, and I am starting to feel sorry for myself.  He just whines and moans all night.  I can't sleep with him doing that.  I'm such a light sleeper.  I got an eye mask to sleep with though, and it's really helping me a lot.  I did a pretty good job today about getting up, getting myself ready, kids dressed and ready, house is clean.  Josiah's been sleeping for 4 hours (8:30-12:30).  He had a 103.6 fever this morning, but it went down quickly after I got him up, moving, drinking and even eating.  He actually had quite an appetite this morning.  Thank goodness.

Anyway, I am super tired now.  Feeling out of body all day, like I'm floating above everything in a daze.  I feel bad being on the computer so much, but it's honestly the only way I can stay awake.  I researched some fun Thanksgiving activities.  But yuck, I do not feel like doing any of it.  But Maryn and I did do school (Play Doh, cutting, gluing, coloring, counting, reading), and baked bread, and made a healthy lunch.  MAN life is easy with just one kid!  What the heck did I ever do with only one child around all the time?

I LOVE my new slippers.  And I'm wearing earrings today.  Josiah already tried to pull them out.  Sometimes feeling fresh and pretty really does make a difference.

John works all day today and he has to go to class tonight.  God help me!  I don't know how I'll make it.  Starbucks, maybe??

sickness strikes again

Okay, this is going to sound dumb, but I'm writing this for my own reference.

My poor baby.  He must have pneumonia.  Or something.  He has had a fever since Friday morning.  It started out really low.  Just about 99.0-99.6 all day.  I figured it was just teething pain because he has been drooling and gnawing on his fingers.  He's also hardly wanted to eat a thing.  Saturday afternoon, his fever spiked to 102.4.  Tylenol didn't seem to help him at all, just keeping him in light clothes and giving him lots of popsicles.  Today is Sunday and his fever is still bouncing around from 90-101s.  He hasn't been coughing, but just started to get a ton of congestion in his nose.

So I guess it's to the doctor tomorrow.  They are going to think I'm crazy, bringing my kids in every week.  If we take him to the seminary doctor I'll have to tell him I did not give him the antibiotics he prescribed two weeks ago.  I didn't give them to him because our pediatrician advised us not to unless he had a bacterial infection, which he didn't.

Praying with Faith

I've been sharing with you all here on my blog the story of baby Chaia.  On the verge of tears for nearly a week as she and her parents went through this trauma, I tried to pray.  I say tried because I wasn't very good at it.  I kept finding myself thinking, "Pray with faith, pray with faith."  But how?  Her circumstances seemed so dire.  Surely this sweet little baby wasn't going to make it.  Her Mommy may never hold her alive again without wires attached. "How do I pray with faith?"  I kept asking.  It wasn't there.  I couldn't stir it up, I couldn't push it out, I couldn't find it in me.  


As with almost any problems I have, I figured it out that this all led back to my own pride.  


For Paul says, "I say to everyone among you not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has allotted to each a measure of faith." God has given all Christians varying measures of faith and by this faith we use our gifts as God has allotted to each of us.


Read this excerpt from John Piper:  

"So we should pray for ourselves and for others this way. Thus the man with the epileptic boy cried out, "I believe; help my unbelief" (Mark 9:24). This is a good prayer. It acknowledges that without God we cannot believe as we ought to believe. Similarly the apostles pray to Jesus, "Increase our faith!" (Luke 17:5). They pray this way because Jesus is the one who can do that.

This teaching about faith being a gift of God raises many questions. God has answers for them all. Even if we don't, let us seek to put the teaching to its practical Biblical use: namely, the humbling of our pride, and the stimulation of our prayers. In other words, let us pray daily: "O Lord, thank you for my faith. Sustain it. Strengthen it. Deepen it. Don't let it fail. Make it the power of my life, so that in everything I do you get the glory as the great Giver. Amen"

Chaia has taught me that there isn't enough of this in my life.  There is not enough faith.  There is pride, stubbornness, arrogance and intellectual reasoning.  But there is not enough faith.